James Patrick

James Patrick

Mornings on ROCK 108

It was on a shadowy day in spring when his father, Zeus, became glazed over on a fine bottle of God Beer and committed an incomprehensible error in judgment —- as he had a one-night stand with a unicorn. 9 months later James Patrick was born.

Life was rough for young “JP” as the other Unicorns did not let him play in their Unicorn games. So he decided to set out on his own to find Castle Greyskull for guidance. At the gates, he was confronted by Papa Smurf and Gizmo and was told that their master was not home, but that he could seek guidance from The Princess of Power……..She-Ra.

She-Ra showed young JP all the wisdom and physical capabilities he would need to succeed in the world. She then transferred him to Peekablue for more physical training…….Much more physical training.

From there, his training shifted to Mermista, then to Frosta, Flutterina, and Florence Henderson. How JP actually ventured into the radio business is still a mystery. Some say that he lost all his magical powers when he wagered & lost them in a game of Old-Maid.

Some say that he drank away all his powers, others suggest that he rode in from the sunset on the shoulders of a Sasquatch to the ROCK 108 studios. The full truth may never be known.

All that we do know is that he was forced to work on planet Earth and if you get him drunk enough, he will tell you the painful, physical, sexual stories that commenced in Castle Greyskull.

You may be wondering “Where is his Unicorn’s horn?” All we can say is that it’s clearly not on his forehead.

Old rusty dinner fork with wood handle

DAILY DUMBASS 8.16.18

A Florida woman stabbed her boyfriend with a fork during a fight over salad. The guy said that he was upset about the noise his girlfriend was making while mixing salad dressing. The girlfriend then stabbed him several times with the fork. The boyfriend had several fork marks on his head and elbow, but wasn’t seriously…read more »

dry rose on the nature

DAILY DUMBASS 8.15.18

A Pennsylvania man was spotted eating dead flowers from a porch. When the homeowners opened the door, they found the guy wearing his pants backwards, and dead flowers hanging from his mouth. They said the guy even ate some dirt. The guy ran off when the couple yelled at him to leave. Police were able to find the man a…read more »

spyra one

The Next Generation of Squirt Gun Looks AMAZING

It’s called “Spyra One.” There is no pumping required. A press of a button will refill and fire. Simply hold the nozzle in clean water, press the button on the side for a few seconds, and you’re good to go. No more removing and refilling a separate tank constantly. The internal pump will re-pressurize water during…read more »

Concerts