Mornings on ROCK 108
It was on a shadowy day in spring when his father, Zeus, became glazed over on a fine bottle of God Beer and committed an incomprehensible error in judgment —- as he had a one-night stand with a unicorn. 9 months later James Patrick was born.
Life was rough for young “JP” as the other Unicorns did not let him play in their Unicorn games. So he decided to set out on his own to find Castle Greyskull for guidance. At the gates, he was confronted by Papa Smurf and Gizmo and was told that their master was not home, but that he could seek guidance from The Princess of Power……..She-Ra.
She-Ra showed young JP all the wisdom and physical capabilities he would need to succeed in the world. She then transferred him to Peekablue for more physical training…….Much more physical training.
From there, his training shifted to Mermista, then to Frosta, Flutterina, and Florence Henderson. How JP actually ventured into the radio business is still a mystery. Some say that he lost all his magical powers when he wagered & lost them in a game of Old-Maid.
Some say that he drank away all his powers, others suggest that he rode in from the sunset on the shoulders of a Sasquatch to the ROCK 108 studios. The full truth may never be known.
All that we do know is that he was forced to work on planet Earth and if you get him drunk enough, he will tell you the painful, physical, sexual stories that commenced in Castle Greyskull.
You may be wondering “Where is his Unicorn’s horn?” All we can say is that it’s clearly not on his forehead.
A mother in Pennsylvania was thrown in jail after her 11-year-old son was found staggering along a street while sloshed on cinnamon whisky. Police were called to an address around 5pm on Sunday and witnessed the boy yelling at passing traffic before running into his home. A witness told police the boy drank nine small…read more »
A 21-year-old man – high on meth – stripped during a church service in North Dakota and splashed himself with holy water in front of the congregation. The guy was at the Spirit of Life church earlier in the day and was asked to leave when he tried to bless people. He returned to the…read more »
A man from Missouri posted a video on Facebook showing how to remove an ankle monitor. He sticks the butter knife in and out of the device, before grabbing a utility tool to unscrew part of it. In just under 4 minutes, he’s got it off, without damaging it, or breaking the circuit and alerting…read more »
On Monday Night Football — New Orleans Saints QB Drew Brees surpassed Peyton Manning’s all-time record of 71,940 yards that was set in 2015. The Saints official Twitter account released a hilarious video from the former NFL QB to congratulate Brees. From one legend to another. 😂 (🎥: @Saints) pic.twitter.com/5p09Mrlf6H — theScore (@theScore) October 9,…read more »
A statue of Chris Cornell was unveiled in his hometown of Seattle on Sunday. The statue was commissioned by his widow, Vicky. She was there with their children Lily, Toni and Christopher, as well as Cornell’s former Soundgarden bandmates Kim Thayil, Matt Cameron and Ben Shepherd. Chris Cornell was found dead in a Detroit hotel…read more »
A driving instructor in New York has been arrested on DUI charges after he drove off without his students and rear-ended another car. The 58-year-old was instructing four students when they grew suspicious that he was drunk. The students asked him to stop at a McDonald’s & they got out and called 911. Police say…read more »